Never Forget

This life of ours that has so many shifting changes
some we can foresee
while others blindside us with an unforgivable vengeance
and we wonder, did we make the wrong choice
what can this sorrow teach us?

I see his red truck and wear his snookie cap even though it is not cold
Sleeping at night is a forgotten promise
so I fill that space with an enormous mastiff named Emmie Lou
she is grateful for the space but questions me every night I invite her to sleep in his place

It truly is the small stuff that come to light so quickly
freshly made coffee in the morning and excited chatter about what we might design or create that day
finding ourselves holding hands while we slept
that heart warmth so simple and profound

Growing in love with our faults and character flaws
that knowledge that he accepted me in all my forms and loved me just the same
As the broken shell, I was valuable and beautiful to him
I can only hope that he knows that I mirrored that for him in the best ways I knew how
Today, the missing of him has blindsided me over and over
This river of tears and fears seems an endless mudslide