Friday, June 19, 2015


In the month of December
we would wake
holding hands
feeling that pulse of life
transmitting from one to the other
it was not our usual way of waking up
yet, each morning we found ourselves
connected in some way during our dream time
we marveled at this, after 15 years
new habits of love surprising both of us
I miss that wake up time
that new day dawning
where we might discuss a day's adventure or upcoming work
often, he would let me doze while he took dogs out
setting chickens free in the early day
the fresh smell of coffee
makes me feel those happy times over and over again
It is that connection to another human
where two become one
finishing thoughts or picking up where one is slowing down
I did not foresee his slowing down
sometimes it still catches me by surprise
that he is not here physically
when it feels tough
he will not allow me to fall deeper
Indigo is my rescue when I sob in my sleep
resting her golden head next to mine
touching paw to hand until morning time
these dogs ground me
a reason to keep taking it one day at a time
sometimes, one moment gets me through
he is my missing piece
not a hole in me
just that reminder of a huge space he filled
with such gentleness
waking my soul to happy times

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