Breath of Life

My family is here
I have waited almost 8 months
to see them, feel them and know they are within arms reach
today, Cyn on a paddle board and me in Rick's last birthday gift
a sea kayak, paddled and played in a pod of 5 dolphins
and finally, a sea turtle showed its shy self for a moment
"Dolphin" means "breath of life"
some days, I feel I don't have it in me to even take a good breath
today, though, tears streamed my face
salt water to salt water
as I could feel so strongly, his joy, his amazement
and most of all his wonder at the silver grey
of the dolphins
we were far out on the ocean line
and a yellow butterfly appeared out of nowhere
so I knew, as did Cynthia that both Rick and Julie were
with us
giving us the gift of sheer joy
in that moment
I felt connected to everything and anything
and it was like God touching me softly
a reassurance that it is okay to still breathe